This article explores the definition and mechanics of love through the lens of ancient Christian Tradition, framing it not as a subjective feeling, but as an objective, rule-bound action centered on God.

The Core Definition of Love

“God is Love” and love is fundamentally a verb. It must be bounded by objective “guardrails” to ensure that what you are doing is actually good for the other person, rather than just what “feels good.”

“Love is the purposeful, voluntary sacrifice you make for the good of another. To love someone is to ‘will’ ‘the good’ for them.”

The 7 Ground Rules of Love

Love requires obedience to specific rules to prevent harm to relationships. These actions can be directed toward people, material things, ideas, and God:

  1. Trust - Believing the other wills your good.
  2. Respect - Valuing the other.
  3. Honor - Uplifting the other based on their value.
  4. Restraint - Ensuring actions are ordered toward good, not selfishness.
  5. Selflessness - Directing actions at the needs of the other. (Serving your own interests is only a “happy coincidence,” not the primary goal).
  6. Sacrifice - Willingness to sacrifice based on the relationship’s depth and value.
  7. Obedience - Adhering to the rules of love to protect the relationship.

The Priority of Love

To love correctly, one must learn from God, the “author of love.” The 10 Commandments primarily teach one central rule:

“Do NOT love anything or anyone more than God. Love God FIRST.”

By prioritizing God, human loves become properly ordered, making it easier to love one’s neighbor.

The Ultimate Example & The Need for Forgiveness

Learning to love is a lifelong journey frequently interrupted by human selfishness and passions. Because we inevitably break the rules of love, forgiveness is essential.

  • The Ultimate Example: Jesus’s voluntary crucifixion serves as the ultimate example of obedience, sacrifice, and willing the “good” for others to the point of death.
  • Reconciliation: The Sacrament of Reconciliation allows humans to physically mend their breaking of love’s rules, reconciling them to God and others.
  • Divine Forgiveness: Even while being tortured and abandoned, Jesus demonstrated ultimate forgiveness, stating: > “Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.”

Sacrifice of Thanksgiving

Modern society often views sacrifice merely as a way to “appease the gods,” but historically and theologically, sacrifices are also vital expressions of thanksgiving.